Defining Wellness
- Samantha
- May 10, 2018
- 10 min read
There are no two people in this world that have the same exact view of wellness and of what they want in life. That is because our lives, bodies, minds, successes, and hardships are different. The parts of wellness that come naturally to one person can feel like an impossible hurdle for someone else. In order to be in a state of wellness, we need to define exactly what it means to us. You need to know yourself: your strengths, weaknesses, goals, passions, hates, and loves. Success comes from tuning into you.
Let me introduce to all of you five women who inspire me and a glimpse into their wellness journeys:
Jessica Bird (Owner, Zaia Soul, @zaiasoul)
Alex Vieira (Health and Wellness Coach, Commence Fitness, @commencefitness)
Kellie Reidinger (Physical Therapist and Yoga Instructor)
Jenna Clark (Actress)
Jenny Klaum (COO, Boditude, @boditude_)
Describe what wellness means to you.
JB: Wellness means being consciously aware of your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual self, and honoring their needs holistically, with gratitude and acceptance.
AV: Wellness means feeling as good as you can in your body and mind. It means taking care of yourself in the best ways possible for YOU. Wellness is more than adopting a food practice or meditation, it's becoming a person who embodies practices that make you feel the best you can.
KR: Wellness is your ability to find balance amongst your physical self, mental self, spiritual self, relationships and even your finances. It's learning new ways to optimize these parts of your life that align with your values and beliefs in ways that fit your personal lifestyle.
JC: Wellness means being happy and healthy. Success does not apply here; if you try, then you are already successful.
JK: Wellness to me means an overall and holistic feeling of contentment, health, and happiness.
Was there a specific time or event that shifted how you approach self-care?
JB: After a break up several years ago, I turned inwards in my search for love. I declared I was in a committed, monogamous relationship with myself. I treated myself as a significant other. I pursued... me. Perhaps not so ironically, I began to learn a great deal about myself, and fall in love with the person in the mirror. I learned to tune into my various "selves" - physical, emotional, mental - and through that discovered the spiritual. Building a yoga practice helped guide me to integrate the four "selves" holistically, by honoring them separately and bringing them into balance. This catapulted my journey and helped define what self-care means to me today. It is both a perspective and a lifestyle.
AV: Mid-way through college, I decided that I would join a weight-loss program. At this point, I was very overweight and was increasingly depressed with how I looked and how I acted and felt because of it. After joining the program, I fell in love with health and fitness, specifically, feeling good about eating, working out and finding out new things the body could do. This was well and good for a while, it definitely changed how I felt but a pivotal turning point was after college graduation. I went to graduate school and became increasingly depressed and anxious to the point where I went home every weekend and spent as much time as I could by myself, in my apartment. During this time, I obsessively worked out and ate nothing, essentially giving myself an eating disorder. Prior to the second semester, I decided to withdraw from the school and return home. A few months later, I started seeing a therapist and psychiatrist because I was so depressed and ridden with anxiety. At this point in time, I realized the importance of taking care of yourself in a variety of ways. While I did not want to, I turned to medication for assistance with the caveat that it would not be long term. Telling myself I did not want to be on meds forever allowed me to focus on the aspects of wellness and self-care that I was missing.
KR: Yes. In college, I was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease. After, exhausting a myriad of medications and minor procedures a friend told me to try yoga for pain and stress management. At first, I hated it. The first class I took was painful and I left half way through. Then, I went back, again and again until one day during savasana I had an epiphany. I realized that self-care is not the easy way out. But, if I wanted to live a long, healthy, peaceful life, I had no choice but to learn how to be my own advocate, my own doctor, my own pain medicine. For me, that meant starting with crying through savasana and coming back again the next day.
JC: Yes. I was a freshman in college. My acting teacher drove me home one day to tell me that because I wasn't eating, I had no energy to act and would fail the course. Once I realized that this would affect what I love to do and eventually kill me, I submitted myself to outpatient treatment to start the long and hard journey of being free from my eating disorder.
JK: Yes! I feel that growing up I was made to feel as though being selfless was the righteous way to live. I struggled with depression and anxiety and confused asking for help with being ungrateful. After college, my friend started a wellness company and learning from her example helped me to better understand self care.
How do you strive to integrate wellness into your everyday life?
JB: I strive to integrate wellness into my every day life by being present. When present, I can be more consciously aware of myself, my needs, my environment, my life. I can more fully support myself and the people around me. I sing, dance, play, and laugh. I have a yoga and meditation practice that remind me the power of breath and inner stillness. I eat a plant based diet because it feels right physically and emotionally. I journal to sort through emotions and express myself. I read/listen to thought provoking books. I connect with nature, prioritize play and adventure, schedule me-time, and try to focus my energy on the reality I want to create. Wellness is a lifestyle.
AV: I start each day with my morning rituals of waking up early, sipping my coffee and making a healthy breakfast. Taking my time and adding in things like journaling, stretching or mindfulness really helps me to start my day positively. I strive to eat as healthy as I can (using a moderation approach) focusing on nutritious, whole foods. I exercise as many times as I feel good for in a week. My self-care includes alone time (well, with my dog) so I spend time walking, relaxing and reading, cooking and doing other practices that relax me each night.
KR: I am constantly learning new ways to fit a healthy lifestyle into my busy week. Every Sunday, I look at my schedule and pencil in time for me. Sometimes, that means telling my friends, family, and boyfriend that I am busy so that I can fit in my workout, meditation or even just meal prep for the next day. I also strive to do new things to stay active- the fun way! Biking, hiking in new places with friends, doing yoga in the park, playing on intramural sport teams, and meditating on my paddle board are all ways I find my "space" - that one reserved for healing time.
JC: I have anxiety that likes to pop up masqueraded in fear. Instead of listening to this fear and running away from it, I tackle it head on. There are so many things that my mind has been afraid of. I have a "Bucket List" of all the things that I strive to push myself to do. With every check in the box is another peg in making myself better.
JK: I have implemented the practice of gratitude and mindfulness into my everyday life with a special focus on positivity and being aware of my perspective.
What has been your greatest success in your pursuit of wellness and/or balance in your life?
JB: Living a wellness centered lifestyle has brought a level of joy, confidence, and gratitude that I had never before experienced. I feel like I have found myself and am discovering my place in this world.
AV: After losing a lot of weight and getting really interested in health and fitness, I became very obsessive when I was highly depressed and anxious. This led to (what I say was) an eating disorder and over-exercising. Upon mending some of those mindset issues, I was able to teach myself to have better balance in my food and workout regime, and in-turn life. Doing so has allowed me to be more at peace with my mind, my body and life.
KR: I feel my biggest success is ultimately discovering a sense of spirituality that, at one point, never felt attainable to me. Being ill, for me, led me away from any form of faith because I felt hopeless. Through, my yoga study, attending silent retreats, and traveling alone to new places that led me to great friends, I re-discovered what it means to feel full of light and energy that will guide me to where I need to be.
JC: Overcoming my eating disorder. It was a long, uphill battle, but I am finally on the top of the hill looking down. I see other friends along the trail and I encourage them to keep going. Being eating disorder free has been the most amazing feeling.
JK: My greatest success was finally getting myself to start therapy. I only went for a few months, but it took years to accept for myself advice I had given to so many others.
What has been your biggest challenge or barrier to achieving wellness and/or balance in your life?
JB: If I fail to prioritize me-time, I am apt to disconnect from myself. This disconnection is my biggest barrier to wellness and balance. Whenever I start feeling anxious or off balance, I know that I am disconnected to one of my "selves" and only need to look inwards and find stillness. Meditation, yoga, and writing are tools I use to help re-connect. And then I play!
AV: My mind! I often get caught up in the "what if's" or "this will happen if..", "if only I did...", "I must..." that bring me back to a place of sadness. I try to take control of these by being mindful and practicing more holistic wellness techniques in order to get rid of the thoughts.
KR: What is life without challenge right?? Haha. This question is hard for me to answer because I sort of want to scream- "everything?!" Being a young adult with a gastrointestinal disorder has endless challenges, however, I do think there is one that sticks out. The hardest thing for me to overcome was finding the confidence to combat social norms and stick to my wellness plans regardless of the judgment of myself and others. Over time, I found my voice and learned to let go of people/habits that didn't align with my health even though it meant being left out. The truth is, I am not ''normal" compared to other millennials.. but, that isn't because I have chronic pain/illness, it's because I am my own unique person that is on my own journey making honest decisions to better my health.
JC: My generalized anxiety disorder. It likes to pop up in the most inconvenient of places. Sometimes it'll show its face when I am performing onstage. Sometimes it will be in the middle of a long 8 hour drive. And sometimes it will be in the middle of the night just trying to fall asleep. It used to prohibit me from doing anything. 5 months ago, I couldn't leave the house. Taking a 10 minute car ride to Walmart was a challenge. I was constantly fighting. My husband used to have to park outside my job and wait inside his car for the 6 hours I was working, just so I knew I would be okay. I fought, I cried, I battled. I am not fully there, but I feel as if I have overcome the biggest obstacle. I now just finished driving cross country. I look back at the past three weeks, and the 43 hours I spent in the car, and cannot remember what it used to feel like not being able to spend even 10 minutes in the car without having a panic attack.
JK: My biggest challenge was breaking stereotypes or cultural norms where I felt it was expected of me to stay at a certain job or act or be a certain way.
What advice would you give to someone who is starting the journey to seek wellness/balance in his or her life?
JB: Wellness and balance is a series of daily decisions. Aim to do what your highest self will be proud of, and what your future self will thank you for. It is my daily mantra and hasn't steered me wrong.
AV: Wellness and balance is not an overnight change. It takes time to develop practices and mindsets that set you on a path towards these things. While overnight habits can start a trend, working on things you enjoy daily is what makes the difference. Wellness and balance have different definitions for everyone--find what it means to YOU.
KR: This journey does not have a destination. Life is learning, and loving to accept yourself in each moment of your journey, no matter how helpless or powerful you feel - that is the challenge. Additionally, you are not alone. We live in a society that has endless resources- use them!! Reach out to friends of friends of friends. Find books and websites. Support is there- you just have to look. And sometimes, even so, you may feel alone. That is when you look inside and find your unshakeable strength.
JC: Keep going. There were so many times I wanted to give up and let my disease succumb me. I thought it would be easier that way, because I knew what it felt like and that was comfortable. It's scary not knowing what lays ahead. I get it. I totally do. But it's also amazing. I changed my thought process on that. I made scary feel amazing. I made comfortable feel boring. I told myself that I just had to keep pushing, day by day. It is a long process, but it is the most important one I ever did in my life.
JK: Be as kind to yourself as you would be to your best friend. Be proud of yourself. Love yourself. And just keep doing what ever you need to do to find happiness and health.
I can tell you that none of their journeys were easy. To find wellness, you must choose it every single day. As difficult as it may be on some days, each of these women would tell you that deciding to pursue wellness is worth it. The questions I ask each of you now are what will be the moment that you will decide define what wellness means to you and when will you choose to actively pursue it? Why not now?
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