Choosing Wellness

There are not many things in life and the world around us that are totally in our control. It is a hard fact to admit, but its true. Even the very essence of life is not in our control -- we're born, we live, and we die. There are no exceptions. The thing we can control is how we treat this life and ourselves through the journey. My challenge to all of you (and to myself) is to focus on choosing wellness.

Though "health" is often associated with wellness, they are not one in the same. You can have no past medical history and live a life void of wellness. You can live with physical, mental, or any other chronic illness and have a wellness-based lifestyle. Wellness is a state of balance in your life. It is wholeness, happiness, and fulfillment wrapped in a package that looks different for every individual. It is multi-dimensional. I like to break it down with clients into the following categories: physical, emotional, intellectual, social, environmental, and spiritual. To find wellness in each category you must first explore what you need in yourself. Here are some starting points and questions to consider:

PHYSICAL WELLNESS: This is often the first part of wellness we think of in modern society. We are inundated with fitness programs and diets. The first part of finding physical wellness is recognizing that every person's physical body is different. What one person posts on social media that has been revolutionary may not work for you. The first (and second and third) thing you try may not work for you. So start with this question: How are you supporting your body? Reflect on your sleeping habits, physical activity routines, the foods you eat, and the water you drink. Is there something you know makes you feel better but is hard to work into your routine or maintain? What is the block there? Choose one small change to make first and hold yourself accountable.

ENVIRONMENTAL WELLNESS: Does your environment support you? Does it sometimes feel like when your home starts to get cluttered it oddly mirrors your cluttered/overwhelmed mind? (Mine does...) Finding ways to make your cleaning routines manageable so that you never walk into a room and feel more on edge is really helpful. Also, research shows that being in nature helps support your health and happiness. Do you get outside when you can? Even 5 minutes a day can make a difference! At a job that doesn't let you get outside...even getting a plant or a nice picture of nature can help improve a sense of calm in a room.

SOCIAL WELLNESS: Are you someone who recharges by being around a lot of people, a few people, or alone? Honor that. Often we need a combination. Just be aware of the difference between alone time and isolating yourself. It's also very important to know which relationships serve you and your wellbeing. Is there a person you can call that provides the support that helps you feel heard, feel validated, and start healing? Who is feeding into the drama (misery really does love company)? Choose who you reach out to wisely. And by all means, cut out toxic relationships. As adults, we can choose what relationships we foster.

INTELLECTUAL WELLNESS: Intellectual wellness refers to what you fill your mind with day to day. Do your thoughts support you? Are your thoughts reducing your stress or creating more stress? For whatever reason, we tend to be our own biggest critic. Learning to be kind to yourself is hard when it's not the norm. When I first started practicing this, I started judging myself for being hard on myself... which was counterproductive. So what do you do? Give yourself permission to not be perfect. Focus on what is in your control. Make a list of strategies to reduce stress for those moments when it's hard to break out of that self-blaming stress cycle.

SPIRITUAL WELLNESS: This does not have to be (but can be) religious. The biggest part of spirituality is connection: finding what you feel connected to and what you do to feed that connection. It can be a higher power, religion, nature, music, really anything. Find that practice and embrace it. Whatever gives you that feeling of being part of something bigger than just you or gives you that sense of awe..that's it. You found it.

EMOTIONAL WELLNESS: This part is my favorite. What are your emotional outlets? We need to let out and own our happiness, sadness, and everything in between. Let this be a release! You can talk to a person, talk to yourself, write, dance, sing, run, play a game, laugh, cry...whatever feels right! Just own it. My favorite emotional outlet is singing show tunes in the car. Talk about a release. Plus, no one can judge me when I am off key. Also, how do you celebrate success and the good in your life? Focusing on this fosters positive emotions and resilience. Anyone who knows me knows that gratitude is a central concept in my life. For years I have written and spoken gratitude lists daily.

Notice how not one of those dimensions mentions the need to have a perfect body or a mind free from mental illness. The truth is, no one is forever in perfect health. Health is fleeting and only partially in our control. Wellness is a lifestyle.

As an occupational therapist, my job is to help those impacted by injury, illness, or any other circumstance "live life to the fullest." To me, that translates to finding how each person defines wellness and how to integrate that definition into daily life. It is a choice and not an easy one to make or stand by. I often found myself slipping away from it and growing complacent. Complacency for me can quickly lead me to laying on the couch, isolating from friends, with no energy to do anything I love. So what did I do to break out of complacency? I started setting reachable goals. Every week I sit down and set goals for myself that relate to one or more of the dimensions of wellness. My goals are everything from drinking more water to spending time with people. This allows me to be accountable and see progress. The important part is that the goals are realistic and reachable. I set myself up for success one goal at a time rather than trying to make over my entire life and routine in one swoop. We can all make one change to move towards the best version of ourselves. We just have to choose to make one small change. What goal can you set? Comment below!

#wellness #selfcare